Sunday, March 15, 2009

Chuck Norris Advocates Secession

I have been waiting a long time to rip Chuck Norris a new asshole, I'm sure this will piss many people off, but here it is:
Un-American hero wanna-be Chump Norris appears to be advocating armed revolution against the United States of America.
Forget about the amateurs in The Weather Underground, The Earth Liberation Front, or the SLA that kidnapped Patty Hurst. This is "Missing In Action" #16. Armed with a leathal combination of Karate, Hollywood stunts and the Bible, Chump has swung into action by first proposing that the Bible be introduced as a teaching tool in public schools. . Don't believe me? Take a look at the video in the highlighted link. This was my original Beef with Chump, while wrapping himself in his bullet-ridden flag he has forgotten that this country was founded on Secular principles. As author Bruce Wilson writes:
"The centrality of Christianity as a driving force in American history can hardly be disputed, but there's another story to be told because America was founded as a secular, not a Christian, nation. Secular government was a radical, uniquely American innovation that some believe enabled the United States to prosper free from the sort of gruesome internecine religious warfare, in which some combatants literally "pulled guts out for God", that wracked post-Reformation Europe".

--But wait, there's more.
Things have gotton bad for assholes of wealth and privilege. We had eight teeth-grindingly long years of Fascism, with the treasonous outing of CIA agents, lying the country into an illegal war, the illegal wiretapping of U.S. citizens, and this weeks revelation that Dick Cheney ran an executive assassination ring out of the office of the Vice President. Bombing and torturing civilian populations in other countries was just fine for tough guys like Walker, Texas Treasonist. But for people like Chump Norris and serial propagandist Rush Limbaugh, their worst nightmare has come true. A Brilliant young black man, a Constitutional expert trained at Harvard Law has shown the country and the entire world that America has regained it's collective senses. Obama's reuniting of the American spirit will not set well with the thieving reich-wing that has pretty much had their way since Reagan.
Yes, things are so bad that Chump has volunteered to be "President of Texas". According to THIS article, The working model for Chumps plan is the fight to the death at the Alamo. Remember folks, this involved a lot of guns and bayonets. Chucklehead proposes that Tex-ass be the first of the formerly United States to secede from the Union. Undoubtadly, the Palinistas in Alaska will follow next, as Sarah Palin's husband was an active member of the Alaska secessionist movement who's founder blew himself up with a bomb. According to cow-pie Chuck's article, there are "thousands of cells" waiting to swing into action, with the battle cry of "remember the Alamo" definately not refering to dog food.
Let's take a look at the definition of sedition, from wikipedia:
"Sedition is a term of law which refers to covert conduct, such as speech and organization, that is deemed by the legal authority as tending toward insurrection against the established order. Sedition often includes subversion of a constitution and incitement of discontent (or resistance) to lawful authority. Sedition may include any commotion, though not aimed at direct and open violence against the laws. Seditious words in writing are seditious libel. A seditionist is one who engages in or promotes the interests of sedition".
"Put simply, sedition is the stirring up of rebellion against the government in power. Treason is the violation of allegiance to one's sovereign or state and has to do with giving aid to enemies or levying war. Sedition is more about encouraging the people to rebel, where treason is actually betraying the country".
--By the above standard, Chump is clearly a seditionist, and a potential Traitor if he is indeed advocating armed revolution.
America has always flirted with Fascism. The term Fascism was coined by Italian dictator Mussolini who also called it "Corporatism". After the first Great Depression, a group of industrialists, allegedly including Prescott Bush, hatched a failed attempt to overthrow the Government and President Roosevelt.
Now, after nearly ten years of Republican rule that has left the country in economic chaos and the scorn of the world, there appears to be another plot in the works to further destabilize over 200 years of unified American Democracy. It's leader is Chuck Norris, his finger on the trigger, and his underground "cells" goose-stepping into the past.


Martial Development said...

There are valid objections to his comments, but "sedition"? You need to be careful throwing that charge around, lest you be caught in your own trap.

Man of the West said...

Once more, a little bit stronger, please. I'm not entirely sure where you stand on the subject. :)

There were a couple of chuckles:

Bombing and torturing civilian populations in other countries was just fine...

I'm sure you're familiar with Nagasaki, Hiroshima, and Dresden, and Manzanar. Nasty things that administration did, weren't they? Some would say that they were justified by the national security situation of the United States at the time. Others might disagree. But it is hardly possible to ignore the Democratic Party's historical connection with some truly hellacious civilian bombings. I bring it up only as a means of showing that it is not at all as though Republicans = evil and Democrats = good. The situation is tad more complex than that.

I also note that according to the column you linked to, Chuck's specific concern is that the country is gradually moving toward totalitarianism, and that he notes that "...Republicans...were taking us to the same place, just slower." It appears that you and Chuck share a dread of totalitarianism. Ironic, and tremendously amusing into the bargain.

Hand2Hand said...

A couple comments.

First, I lost all respect for Chuck Norris when he appeared on the cover of Cigar Aficionado to announce that he was creating a line of cigars called "Lone Wolf Cigars." He was going to use the proceeds to fund his Kick Drugs Out of America Foundation.

In short, he's going to use drug money to support an organization opposed to drug use.

That is wrong in so many ways that I could be here all night typing away.

However, I do support the right of individual states to secede from the union. In fact, Texas has one of the most active secessionist movements and I fully support it. The last thing we need is to give a third Bush a chance to use an elected office in Texas as a springboard to the presidency.

All the oil's been taken from the ground in Texas, so there's nothing they can offer the rest of the country that we can't get in any of the other states.

As a former Connecticut Yankee, I remember how Texans used to drive around with bumper stickers that said "Freeze a Yankee - Raise Oil Prices."

Sure, there are a lot of great musicians from Texas, like ZZ Top, Buddy Holly, Stevie Ray Vaughn, Edgar Winter and Steve Earl among countless others. But I don't consider that reason enough to keep Texas in the union.

If they want to go, I say "Buh-bye! Don't let the door hit you on your selfish, egotistical ass on the way out!"

Dojo Rat said...

Sorry, but lobbiest payola aside, there are vast differences between Democrats and Republicans.
Let me say that I was born in 1959, so I can't comment on Dresden.
My first political awareness was when Kennedy was killed. Then his brother. Then MLK. And not by lone nuts, either. Then Watergate. Then Iran Contra. Then the Savings and Loan scandal.
Then Bill Clinton got a blowjob. Big Deal.
Then the stolen 2000 election.
Then Cheney's energy task force which is still classified. Then ignoring every warning from our own CIA and every other country intel about the pending 911. Then the lies for the Iraq war.
Do we see a pattern here?
Let me point out that Norris says all this in the context of arming himself to the teeth on his Texas ranch (which I have no problem with) but contextually he links it to a potential armed rebellion (In a linked interview with Glen Beck). If a lefty said that they would be toast. All at a time when the shambles of the right wing via Limbaugh are openly calling for Obama to FAIL. Calling Obama a Commie, Islamic, etc. etc.
Everyone reading this blog is smart enough to read between the lines.
As dissapointed as I was at the Cheney administration, I never called for my State to secede or anything resembling rebellion. I donated money to three political campaigns (and the Red Cross) and lent my support in ways I could.
Imagine if someone like the editor of "The Nation" magazine talked like Norris during the Cheney administration. Jail time. Remember spokesflack Ari Fleisher saying at a press confrence that "The American people had better watch what they say" after 911?
But all-in-all, I love the frank discussion. Thanks for all the great comments and criticism, it's all good and it wouldn't hurt to build a national dialogue on this stuff.

K T said...

I am sad to see that in America, more and more people focus on what separates them from their fellow American, than on what unites them.

All I have to say, is if you really want the best for your country, you must always keep in mind that though the person with whom you disagree seems totally out of order, you can still argue your point, without resorting to name-calling.

They may seem fascist - they may be fascist, but they are still Americans, and if you care about your country, you're better off arguing against their viewpoints, without disrespect (at least in my opinion).

No one changes their minds easily, or overnight. America got where it is, because Americans can work together. Greece (where I live) is where it is, because Greeks don't always work well together.

I think that should be food for thought for all.

- Kostas

Hand2Hand said...

Amen! Hallelujah! Testify Brother Rat!

Great post!

The fact is, the Republican philosophy has been based on division, on playing races and classes against each other since through the 20th Century.

Economically, their whole philosophy is based on complete laissez faire, which was discredited as a result of the Great Depression. Everything Harding, Coolidge and Hoover did brought us to that point. Reagan and both Bushes took that philosophy to heart and look where we are now - on the brink of Great Depression 2.0.

I'm no fan of Clinton, but the worst things he did was borrowing from the Republican playbook on things like NAFTA, GATT, the WTO, and Star Wars/SDI. It's why I voted for Ralph Nader in 2000.

If history is any indication, we won't get out of this current depression with any help from the party who's spokesman says he wants Obama to fail.

Man of the West said...

...I never called for my State to secede or anything resembling rebellion.

I'm sure you didn't. But others did. I well remember the calls for "blue-state" America to separate from "Jesusland." :)

Dave R. said...

"Congress shall make no law regarding an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof..."

There's a problem inherent in uniform public primary education, which didn't even take its first steps until the founding generation were all dead. That is that a public near monopoly forces all sides into school boards or state legislatures to impose their own desires on everyone if they want any say in how their own children are educated. Norris, et al are being entirely rational only in so far as they're saying, "hey, our tax dollars are being spent to educate our children and we'd like a say in how they are educated."

The secular left want it both ways, they got custody of the nation's children for thirty hours a week for twelve years (minus summers, plus homework), and they want prayer and the bible off the table during that time because they're spending taxpayer money so "no establishment," but they get to promote an environmentalism that amounts to a secular religion when carried to its extreme conclusion, and they're offended when the parents get uppity or any other ideology wants a piece of the action.

As for America's secular government, I think there's some modern revision going on here. John Adams said "Our Constitution was made only for a moral and religious people. It is wholly inadequate to the government of any other." That's actually debatable and you may disagree with it. But it was a common sentiment at the time. The fact is, the secular government was founded by and initially co-existed with a deeply religious populace. The current state of play, where "no establishment" is interpreted so broadly as to crowd out "free exercise" is largely a twentieth century invention.

Dojo Rat said...

Many of the founding fathers were deists, believing in a natural law of reason (Jefferson et. al.)or even Masons. If you know anything about Masonry it is antithetical to Christian beliefs, perhaps even Luciferian. The founders remembered their Puritan forefathers such as Cotton Mather's witch hunts, and the supreme power of the Church in Europe. They wanted the seperation to protect the Church from the State as well as the State from the Church.
We are a SECULAR society, period. Now, that doesn't mean people are not Spiritual, which is what really challenges the power structure of the Church, the flock developing their own individualized beliefs.
If you want Religion in school, perhaps we should look at the other side of the coin: tax Churches because they have been meddling in politics. No more free ride.
Environmentalism is a secular religion?
What ever happened to Christians being good stewards of the Earth?

kenposan said...

I used to respect Chuck Norris. Of course, I used to believe in Santa Claus too...

Hand2Hand said...

Hey Dave,

How the hell do you have a secular religion? Secularism, by its very definition, is the enemy of all religion.

And where do you get off saying that caring for the environment is a religion? Silly me. I thought it was based on science. Religion, by definition, is a matter of faith.

DR is right. Our founders were, for the most part, deists. Even those men of faith, notably
Roger Sherman, were vehemently opposed to any government entanglement with religion.

George Washington said it best when he declared "The United States is in no way founded upon the Christian doctrine."

When getting your American History, try reading or listening to something other than Pat Robertson. Your post parrots everything he's ever said on his show.

Dojo Rat said...

I have to hand a lot of respect to you, you understand the value of cultural dogma vs. spiritual enlightenment.
Thank you very much for your contributions,