Friday, May 20, 2011

Happy Rapture Everybody!



Well as many of you have heard, some old duffer named Harold Camping has predicted that the world is coming to an end tomorrow.
He is raking millions of dollars into his ministry and "The Family Radio Worldwide" network.

If Mr. Camping was true to his word as a Gawd-fearing minister he should turn all of his assets over to some charity, today.
Of course, you know that won't happen, after all, Camping predicted the world would end in 1994 also.

So I had an idea;
If any of you evangelicals are going for a ride on Jesus's flying saucer, there are a few things ol' Dojo Rat might be able to use:

1. A new propane barbeque- my old one is pretty worn out. I need one that can sit outside and take the weather, the bigger the better.

2. A table saw. I have a lot of building projects and could really use one now.

3. A stereo with a CD player for the Saloon. My old stereo doesn't have a CD player.

4. Hey, there's gotta be a Christian Biker out there that won't need his Harley Davidson any more. Just mail me the keys and the address of where I can come and get it. Please sign over the title, you know that the DMV will still be here and they want paperwork.

So good luck, onward Christian soldiers.
I'm gonna be hanging out with this guy:

We'll be taking shots of tequila and shooting handguns.

If you want a list of Rapture parties around the country, check the link in this article.

4 comments:

B said...

This is for any of your college student readers:

Student Rapture FAQ

Related: On the slim chance Dojo Rat is Raptured I call firsts on his missle!

(Not sure how I'll get the damn thing back to Indiana...)

hermann said...

Same thing over here in Taiwan. An Yijing master calculated the end, a grade 14 earthquake, a 200m tsunami, braking Taiwan in 2 small parts. He even made his lacays buy containers which they horded in the mountains, inclusive supplies.
And then: nothing happend!
Like for the US guys, nothing happend. So no Harley, no stereo, they keep the money to themselfs, as always, lol.

Dojo Rat said...

You guys still here?

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